Posted by: brian | April 6, 2007

What makes today better than other Fridays?

Why do they call it “Good” Friday? Does this imply that there’s a corresponding “Bad” Friday? When is that, exactly? Friday the 13th? What if Good Friday falls on the 13th? Does it become Neutral Friday? If there’s a Good Friday, is there also a Better Friday, and a Best Friday?

Even more confusing is the whole meat thing. If I’m already going to burn in hell for eternity, does it really matter if I eat part of a dead cow on this specific day? And why is fish not meat? It’s a fleshy part of an animal. Just because the animal breathes through gills, that makes it something other than meat? If so, what exactly is it? As far as I know, it’s not a vegetable, a fruit, or a grain. Where does it go in the food pyramid? What about dolphin? Is that meat? It’s not a fish, so I can only assume it’s meat. Of course, when the rules were made up, they maybe didn’t know that dolphins were mammals, so maybe dolphin is okay too. I hope so, cuz I love me some dolphin on a bun.

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Responses

  1. You’ve gotten the memo that the meat thing was just an economic ploy, right?

    (or so the story goes)

  2. Yeah, but it’s still stupid.

  3. DId I claim it was smart?


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