Posted by: brian | December 7, 2007

I was wrong – there apparently is a god

There’s at least one supernatural entity that can exert control over events in the world. There might be more than one, but I know with certainty that there’s at least one. For the sake of convenience, I’ll call it “god” and use the pronoun “he.” Let me tell you a little bit about him.

He’s an asshole, and he hates me. Actually, neither of those descriptors is adequate in degree to convey his level of assholery and his hatred for me. But, being supernatural and beyond our understanding, it stands to reason that he would exceed our understanding in every possible way.

It’s been a shitty semester. Granted, much of the difficulty I’ve had is self-inflicted. I won’t bore you with the details. Suffice it to say, I’m an idiot. So I’ve got four projects that are due by Wednesday. One of them I’m pretty well done with – I’ll need to do a bit of a redraft, but it won’t be more than an hour or two’s work. The other three will require a lot more effort. I’m so far behind on my studio project that I’m not even sure I should bother trying to finish it. My capstone proposal book? I have a draft of the text, but no images ready, and nothing resembling a layout. I haven’t even started reading the sources for my GIS paper – 8-10 pages, due next Tuesday. (Yeah, I know – I could be doing that right now, while I wait for the tow truck. Fuck off.)

So what happens tonight? Let’s recap: I left the studio around 10:20, waited for a bus, and then got to my car, & started it. I was starving, so figured I’d grab a burger at the Dinkytown McDonalds. The first problem was the window – my drivers-side window wouldn’t open. Must be frozen shut. Other windows open, just not that one. Well, that’s annoying. I’ll just park and go in to grab my food. Which I do. When I get back to the car, I turn the key. Fan starts blowing, radio comes on, lights light up, but the engine doesn’t start. It doesn’t even try. Looks like my starter is shot. Never mind that it worked just fine 5 minutes earlier. So there goes a couple hundred bucks. Nice.

Do I need this shit right now? I guess so. Apparently my life is too carefree. Fucking kill me.

This comes on the heels of a number of frustrations with technology. Long story short, Adobe can lick my shit-stained asscrack. Apparently they don’t figure compatibility between versions of their products is an issue they need to worry about. I fucking hate those fuckwads, and their fucking shitfucking software.

Did I mention that god hates me? I’m not willing to accept that all of this shit happening to me is the result of random consequence. Fuck you, god. Eat shit and die.



  1. Sorry Hun, I hope things get better.

    I know what it feels like to be Murphy’s personal bitch, I didn’t realize until now that Murphy and God are the same person.

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